first christmas

happy belated Christmas. This christmas was the best christmas ever, hands down. It was way more meaningful and even though Sofia got presents it was fine. She was the best present Luke and I got. I hope all had a joyous day.

3 months old!

so this is a late post, but I can't believe Sofia is now 3 mths old! I browsed her pictures from when she was born and when we brought her home and she's changed so much! everyday she's getting bigger and bigger and even though I'm happy she's healthy and meeting all the milestones on target I can't help but feel a little sadness as well. I'm a little sad that in some ways she is becoming more independent from me and it's not by much now but I know w/every milestone she reaches she won't be as helplessly dependent on me as she was the first few days of life or when I carried her inside me. I didn't think it would bother me so much but I first realized it when I stopped breastfeeding her; true it was not by choice but because I went back to work but still...she no longer needed ME for nutrition, she could get that from formula/bottle. Also while giving away some of her newborn clothes to a newly pregnant friend I realized...she no longer fits in these...she's growing up...too fast. I know in my heart I will always be her mother and that in some way she'll always need me...I mean even me at 33 yrs old I need my mom too...not as much but I still do and there are somethings that only my mom can do for me; so I tell myself this as she is no longer a newborn but now an infant.