I am tired......

I am tired.....of still not getting my period. it's now been 5 days late!! and I took a PT but it was negative. I want to tell my body "hey get witht the program here! S**t or get off the pot already so I can start my accupressure or accupuncture exercises!!!"

I am tired...of feeling sick now going on a week. Normally allergies don't get me but they are kicking my butt this time. I wake up every morning congested, coughing and feeling miserable. Could the constant rain be the cuplrit?

I am tired....of one of my 3 dogs acting up. He's a year old and is still chewing his way through stuff. So far the count is:
3 pairs of perfectly good tennis shoes
a pillow
a hair band
a bag of uncooked rice
that's it so far...I dread to think of what he may chew up next. we did not have this problem w/the other 2. Granted the other 2 are chihuahuas compared to this 45+ shepherd mix dog but come on!! I have a gut feeling he misses his twice a day walks ( which we can't do cause of the rain)..... My husband thinks he's being vindictive. dunno............

I am tired....of everyone getting pregnant all around me. It's like I'm getting left behind. True, i've not started IVF#2 nor my Tradition chinese medicine BUT i can't do anything till AF comes. I'm trying to stay positive and keep telling myself "God provided for you and Luke as individuals and as a couple and he WILL provide you w/the babies both of you desire". But i can only say that so much before doubt rears it's ugly head. I wish there was a sign i would accept that would say "hey stupid yes I'm talking to you....YES you WILL get pregnant and you WILL have a baby" I'm just impatient and wish it were to happen soon.

I am tired.....of having to go through so much in my life and seem like I have to work my ass off or sweat big time in order to achieve it. I married late in life, to some people and so I'm now it seems in a race to get pregnant soon before my baby making years are gone forever. I wish just once just ONCE i could get something and not have to sweat it. All I want is a baby that is part of Luke and part of me. Is that too much to ask for?

Lastly.....I am tired of bitching about being tired of all the crap that i have to come across in my life. but...........that's life right? it could be worse i suppose.